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When our children step into high school, everything starts to feel a little different—for them and for us. We’re learning that this stage is less about control and more about creating space: space for God to guide, space for our teen to make their own choices (and learn from them), and space for grace when we fall short. Parenting a high schooler is humbling, but it’s also a beautiful chance to trust God’s plans and love our child unconditionally as they grow into who He made them to be.

1. LEAVE SOME SPACE

  • For God to work/lead guide 
  • For Your Child to Fail/Excel Leave space for your child to start making decisions  
  • For Grace for Yourself Parenting is humbling!

Jeremiah 29:11 God has plans for us, and we can remind ourselves to be in alignment with his plans. This is crucial for a time period where our kids are starting to formulate their own plans, possibly for the first time. We can remind them to align their goals with God. 

Prov. 3:5-6 Trusting in God to direct our paths. 

I Peter 5: 7 Cast your anxieties on Him. We cannot control everything and must “let go and let God.”  

Middle school to high school is a shift from more directive parenting style to a more gradual release style. We are releasing kids to start making more personal decisions and understanding the consequences (both good and bad). The shift can be as simple as moving from “I told you to do that,” to “What path do you think you’re going to take?” This helps them take ownership and not be able to as easily blame the parents when things may not go to plan. 

Question for consideration

  • How might your parent/child conversations shift between middle and high or as your child ages? 
  • In what areas might you see a need to begin relinquishing some control? 

 

2. LOVE CONQUERS ALL

Above all, no matter what, come what may, when my child leaves my house, he/she will know they are loved no matter what

Kids are a main part of our ministry. Time is short. Love covers a multitude of sins and offenses. 

I Thess 3:12 Excel in love 

Question for consideration: Not just in parenting, but when our kids come to church, what can we do to show support and love to the teen ministry? 

In what way(s) can you continue to grow in the area of unconditional love with your kids?

ROMANS 8:26-28 (Message Version) God is our go-to and has all the answers. We are not alone.

 

This was from a talk given by Kevin & Marta Anderton (3 kids) on 8/17/2025. 

Ministries
Youth & Family (includes Teens)